How To: extract from an undocumented database

Here's the problem which you encounter:
There's a database in your company that you need to extract data from. They  want to make that database redundant (and everybody mumbles around you "it's about time!") and you, as the database-know-how, required to create a report with the required fields.
I've done this daunting task twice: first, for a front end that run on Win 95 (in 2008!) That database was on a Syabase database, and believe me, that line isn't even on my CV. The second time I run it from MS-Access, and that was a way more pleasant experience. Those database had couple of things in common, and the most obvious one that they were shelf products, not custom made, and therefor had many tables that weren't actually in use.
And these are the steps I took:
First, ask your Business Analyst (or whomever had given you this task) which fields they need. They can usually give you at least one line of data, some names, etc, which could give you your reference point for investigation.
The second stage for me was to migrate the data to MS-SQL. This stage isn't strictly necessary; after all, if you can query one database you can query them all. But using my own local version has the benefit of (a) there's not a chance I'll mess up the data and (b) I'm using the SQL version I know well with its new features, and that enables me to focus on the problem, not on the differences between different SQL versions.
Now it's time for querying, but before that, a little script could help.
How do you get the size of all the tables in a database?

SELECT 
    t.NAME AS TableName,
    p.rows AS RowCounts,
    SUM(a.total_pages) * 8 AS TotalSpaceKB, 
    SUM(a.used_pages) * 8 AS UsedSpaceKB, 
    (SUM(a.total_pages) - SUM(a.used_pages)) * 8 AS UnuasedSpaceKB
FROM 
    sys.tables t
INNER JOIN      
    sys.indexes i ON t.OBJECT_ID = i.object_id
INNER JOIN 
    sys.partitions p ON i.object_id = p.OBJECT_ID AND i.index_id = p.index_id
INNER JOIN 
    sys.allocation_units a ON p.partition_id = a.container_id
WHERE 
    t.NAME NOT LIKE 'dt%' 
    AND t.is_ms_shipped = 0
    AND i.OBJECT_ID > 255 
GROUP BY 
    t.Name, p.Rows
ORDER BY 
    t.Name

The benefit of this script is clear: in a shelf database there could be heaps of tables that are not even in use. When you start investigating you don't need those. From my experience, start with the second largest table. The largest one is usually a log, and doesn't usually contain any necessary information. Of course you can ignore all the ones that have 0 data or only one line...

And now for the investigation itself. Look up that name. Look up those details. Try to locate foreign keys and indexes. That database was written by a human who has logic: how does that person's logic works?
Sure enough, you'll be able to present some results for your Business Analyst. They will probably be very happy with your results, and only have some comments. Modify the original script, and believe me, they'll be happy. Very happy, even.

No more Messenger (or Marital Crisis)

Microsoft had announced today (January 9th, 2013) that it's going to kill our very dear and old friend: the Instant Messenger (IM), in favor (or favour, depends on your locale) of Skype. Well, Skype has 31 million users, while IM has 330 million users, though we cannot tell if all of them are active or not - apparently those numbers are not published.
One of the main differences between Skype and IM is that Skype is a peer to peer technology, in which its only access to a server is to confirm the password on login; the rest of the time, it's P2P, encrypted, and basically better and safer to use than IM. IM  goes through a server, and all your posts and messages pass through a server as well.(That means that publishing those numbers shouldn't be a problem for Microsoft who owns both technologies, but it's theirs and it is theirs choice).
Nevertheless, it's the use that counts: the first thing we think of when we hear "Skype" is "Internet Telephony" while with IM it's "quick chat" (though you can use both technologies for both), and that's why  I was quite devastated to hear that from my Husband (and no, I didn't shot the messenger, ha ha very funny), since I am a worker on a PC and my favourite method of communicating with my husband is via the IM. Since both of us are in the same profession approximately (he's a web developer) I sometimes use it to send him a quick link or to ask him a tech question... Romantic, I know.
Unfortunately, installing Skype on my machine without the proper set of of headset seems a bit out of order, as I cannot receive or accept calls (I work in a financial institution, remember?)

So therefore let me cry out load: Microsoft! Don't give up! We all love our IM! Don't make it a thing of the past! Alternatively, send me a headset!